Sometimes I get like this-it just comes over me and I can't stop it no matter what I do. The spiraling round and down. I used to think it was a seasonal thing, but more recently it can start even when it's beautiful out. Today is one of those days. I try to get back up emotionally, I try to downplay the feelings I get of wanting to be alone, the grumpyness (is that a word?)and getting irritated over every little thing. Why today I wonder. I had a sugar cookie this morning for breakfast, early, maybe that started it? I saw the tube of uncooked cookie dough in the refrigerator last night that I had forgotten I'd bought. I checked the expiration date and it was past due by about 5 weeks, but I don't think that matters. I took a bite of the dough and it tasted okay so I made them.
Then I had a cinnamon roll later this morning, thinking that might boost my mood. I think I was feeling fine until the sugar cookie but it's hard to tell since I ate it right after I got up because I was on the run to get somewhere. It's now early evening and I still feel like I'm coming apart-could it still be the sugar? If it is something that simple, I'd try to give up sugar, well maybe - or at least not eat it so early in the morning. I don't like this feeling - it could be depression I guess. All I want to do is go to bed and not deal with anything or anyone and wake up feeling positive and motivated and happy tomorrow. I'll let you know how it goes. No sugar in the morning..